My husband and I struggled for years to get pregnant. I actually began my doula journey as a result of this. I wanted to be connected to birth in some way as we were not sure we could conceive. The strain on our relationship was immense, the information for why we could not get pregnant was limited. It was "unexplained" . Every month, every period, came with new pain, a renewed sense of loss and unworthyness. I felt broken. My relationship felt broken. When we finally surrendered to the idea of exploring infertility treatment I had all about I could handle. A few months later and some invasive tests... we conceived.. naturally. My first lesson, trust your body, surrender to it. I spent the first 9 weeks terrified it was to good to be true and being aware we were very blessed.
I had some normal pregnancy challenges, nausea, vomiting, sleepyness and tears. Holding on to gratitude I tried to ride the wave, dove back headfirst into my life and kept on moving. That's surrender right... just going with the flow? Then at 31 weeks pregnant, with my blood pressure climbing, while walking my dogs.. I broke my right arm.